Man-Day Post: Jen’s Guy Vs. The Sexytime Soundtrack

In Man-day by Jensguy21 Comments

Welcome to another installment of Man-day from Jen’s husband, Jen’s Guy.

We all have things on our “Hell” side of the ledger. Things that if we look back on we should probably feel bad about, but don’t really. Here is one of mine.

In college, about the same time I met Jennifer, I had a roommate who was seriously dating a girl. On a good day she was a witch and treated him poorly. They got engaged. She broke off the engagement because there was another guy that she became interested in. This guy never even asked her out. Later, when she realized that guy just wasn’t that into her, she got back together with my roommate. He was happy, all the rest of the roommates (and there were many) were not amused.

One day after finishing my classes, I came home to one of my other roommates speaking with the perspective groom about their wedding night. Obviously, I wasn’t much interested in this particular conversation until groom roommate (let’s call him groommate, heh!) asked me,”  Jimmy (not his real name) said that a lot of guys put together a mix tape for their first night, you know, after the wedding. And that it makes everything easier. I think it sounds kind of cool. What do you think?”

Inside I was all:

But man, Jimmy was selling it. It was some serious grand master level trolling.

So I played along, “I’ve been planning mine since High School. It’s gonna be EPIC!”   Aaaaaand, right there, I killed a little bit of my humanity.

Groommate went to work planning his passion with a passion. There were U2 songs, Chicago, and something from Echo and the Bunnymen. The tape had to have been the full 90 minutes (recordable DVDs weren’t a thing yet.) His optimism for that night was evidently completely off the charts. He’d hear a new song on the radio and it would replace another song in the lineup. And NOBODY told him anything to dissuade him. We did suggest it would be best if it were a complete surprise to his lovely bride. . .

Jen-  Oh you guys were HORRIBLE!!!

Jen’s Guy-  Are. Are horrible. Every one of us would do it again in a second. It really WAS epic.

Jen-  I can’t even imagine!

Jen’s Guy- Keep in mind that the only movies groommate was probably allowed to watch in his future wife’s presence were chick flicks. Every single one of those things runs a pop song once sexytime gets started. Also, 80’s movies:

Jen-  But isn’t that part of the plot? It’s not like a guy pops a cassette into the player. . .

Jen’s Guy-

Jen- Oh, just shut up!

Jen’s guy.  You OWN that movie! You must have watched it several dozen times, no?

Jen- Seriously, shut up with your not shutting up!

Jen’s Guy- I’m going to make a tape right now. If it’s good enough for Lloyd Donner. . .

Jen- Dobbler. . ., and seriously, you aren’t him. . .

Jen’s Guy- Yeah, we’ll see. . .

So, to that end, I’m going to need some input into what should go into this theoretical mixtape. The easy route would be to just pop in some Luther Vandross. Seriously, ANY of it. Kinda feels like cheating though.

Jen- Do you even listen to Luther Vandross?

Jen’s Guy-  Rarely, but I don’t play with mercury in the kitchen either, because it’s dangerous-powerful.  Vandross needs a warning label. Sometimes the world can’t handle all that sexy. Now go, before you ruin the surprise.

Jen-

So, I’m gonna get us started with the first two, then it is YOUR turn to help a brother out. C’mon, it will be fun! And if I get enough participation I don’t have to feel bad about this college indiscretion anymore. . .

Song #1, because, of course it is:

Marvin Gaye- Let’s Get it On.

With the second choice, I’m going to ramp up the ironic cheesiness with the boys that Jen and I have seen in concert multiple times:

Def Leppard- Hysteria

Jen- Love that song! This post is still a complete nightmare though. . .

Jen’s Guy- You will fall before the power of the mixtape, baby. You just wait!

Alright, so let’s ask the JENerally Informed readers what would be on their mix tape?

Jen- Yes, I trust the readers of MY blog, because you do remember what happened when we asked YOUR Facebook friends a simple question about yoga pants?




Go ahead and share this post, you know you want to!

Comments

    1. Yep, we like Zach here as well. I’ll go ahead and select “Whatever it is” because “Chicken Fried” just ain’t gonna get it done when the lights are dimmed. . . :)

  1. Oh my gosh you two are freaking hilarious. That was the best ever.

    Okay…. hmmmm…. Sorry guys, I got nothin.

    1. So “I Have Nothing” by Whitney Houston off of “The Bodyguard” soundtrack it is. . . It’s slow, and not as well known as many of her other songs, but I can dig it. . .

  2. Bwahahahahahahaha. Jens guy outdid himself with this post. This is more than hilarious.

    Whitney Houston – I Will Always Love You would be on my track. Okay, it’s a song that hubby sent me via voice mail many years ago.

    Have a fabulous day. ☺
    Comedy Plus recently posted…Awww MondaysMy Profile

    1. Yep, It’s one of Jennifer’s favorite songs as well. I think she even had it as a ringtone for a few weeks which totally ruins it for the mixtape, unfortunately. . .

    1. You bailed out so quick, I wonder if you actually have such a mix tape in your possession. . . . :)

    1. Jennifer and I had never heard the Charlie Puth song. That was delicious and with Meagan Trainor to boot. Awesome! That is soooo going on the mix tape! Thanks!

  3. Everything I Do (I Do It For You) by Bryan Adams.
    I’m just kidding. Holy cow, no.
    Also, do you really think those two are still married? I don’t. I don’t think they were even married a week.

    My list? Marvin Gaye, probably actually. And some totally weird songs I can’t admit to.
    Tamara recently posted…FROZEN Inspired Grape Pops.My Profile

    1. I had a girl I dated just after high school that insisted the “Everything I do” was OUR song. That relationship didn’t last so long. . . And I LIKE Bryan Adams. He opened for Def Leppard last time we saw them in concert.

      As for groommate and his bride. It wasn’t too long after that that I finally got the courage to ask out that saucy girl down the street with the seriously long legs and I kind of lost track of things. . .a LOT of things. Haven’t been the same for the last 18 years. Did have enough sense to forego the mix tape at the time. . .

  4. I can’t believe I just listened to that entire Def LEpard song. My husband still makes playlists and CD’s….he has boxes of these tapes in our garage. SMH…

    And yes, Lloyd Dobbler totally gets it! Add the last song in Sixteen Candles when she’s about to kiss Jake Ryan on the table and my knees go weak!
    Kristen recently posted…In the Blink of an EyeMy Profile

    1. Jennifer, just squeeled, ” ‘If You Were Here’ by the Thompson Twins!” So there you go. I have just come to realize that I drove Lloyd Dobbler’s exact car in high school. I had one girl I knew that loved my car wayyyy too much (even more than me, and I LOVED that car.) Now I know why. If I would have known, I would have gotten more “mileage” out of that fact. . .

      And you only listened to that song or did you go ahead and pull up “Love Bites” for the twofer?

    1. I’m sure that those particular songs worked out pretty well for the Beach Boys and the Beatles.

  5. Totally LOVED this post! lol

    I know all those songs. I won’t tell you HOW many times I listened to Take My Breath Away. Seriously needed to buy the Top Gun cassette at least twice over because the cassette broke. Ohhhh, cassettes… to think our kids won’t know the “pain” that went with cassette tapes breaking in the ghetto blaster. Ghetto blaster… lol. I’m completely flashing back to the 80’s here.

    I loved Def Leppard – except my hubby ruined Hysteria for me. When I was pregnant, I obsessed over everything – Listeria bacteria being the biggest. You guessed it, the guy sang “Listeria— Bacteria—” to me. Ruined the sing forever.

    Loved this and I love you two – you’re so awesome – I wish we lived next door (even more so when it’s 30 below).

    Thanks for sharing! Wishing you an awesome weekend!
    Jennifer | The Deliberate Mom recently posted…How to Plan the Ultimate and Most Productive Blog Staycation Ever!My Profile

  6. What is hilarious is that “Take my Breath Away,” “In Your Eyes,” and “If You Were Here” (the song that Kristen referenced) were all linked on youtube. SO if you were making a “must have” romantic mixtape for women over 30, it would probably have to have all of those songs.

    I keep telling Jennifer that she needs to host a blogging conference here with side trips to Mexico and pole dancing lessons. I have been told that if such a conference were to happen, I wouldn’t be invited. . .

    1. Like I mentioned previously, I kind of lost track of the guy after I started dating the saucy, long-legged girl from the apartment down the street. I just tried to facebook stalk and the guy doesn’t have a facebook account. That would suggest to me that he is being oppressed and so, yes, they are likely still together.

Leave a Comment